Poor: The punishment was unjust. Improved: The U.S. Court of Military Appeals ruled   that   the   punishment   imposed   by   the court-martial was unjust. CONTRADICTIONS Sometimes,  a  writer  makes  contradictory  remarks in  a  story  without  realizing  it.  When  contradictions occur, the copy editor should delete them or rearrange the  facts  more  logically.  Note  the  following  four examples of typical contradictions: Example  #1 R o b i n s o n ’ s    k e e n    s e n s e    of responsibility,  devotion  to  duty  and h a r d    w o r k ,    a c c o r d i n g    t o    h is commanding  officer,  finally  paid  off May   16   when   he   was   advanced   to Illustrator-Draftsman Third Class. The 16-year veteran is assigned to the aircraft carrier... If  Robinson  is  such  a  responsible  and  devoted worker, why did it take him 16 years to make DM3? The reader will assume that Robinson is not too bright or that the Navy does not reward good men and women. Example #2 A combat veteran of World War II, the  Korean  conflict  and  the  Vietnam War, Capt. Garlin wears the American Defense  Medal,  the  World  War  II Victory  Medal,  the  Navy  Occupation Service  Medal,  the  National  Defense Service   Medal   and   the   National Security Medal. The captain may be a veteran of three wars, but his medals indicate he has seen no combat. Example #3 As a JO, you should have “news sense” —a quality Chief  Clayborne  began  striking  for Personnelman  aboard  the  destroyer USS Mitchel in 1945. The Personnelman rating was established in 1948, so Chief Clayborne could not have been a PN striker in 1945. He must have started out in another rating. Example  #4 Despite  his  3-15  record  and  7.89 earned  run  average,  Bob  Baker  is considered to be a good pitcher. Baker’s   pitching   record   and   ERA   speak   for themselves. Classifying him as a “good pitcher” is both opinionated and contradictory. The writer would have to do a lot of explaining to justify this comment. INCOMPLETENESS that tells you which facts to collect and use and which facts to ignore. But if you do not have this ability or if you  lose  it  momentarily,  the  copy  editor  must  stop stories  that  are  incomplete  or  inadequate  and  return them to you for amplification. This will save you the trouble  of  answering  phone  calls  from  news  media representatives who want more detailed information. Consider the following story, for example: A   Navy   ground   crewman   was killed in an accident at U.S. Naval Air Station   Bennington,   the   Navy announced  today. The  man  has  been  identified  as George  Pine  of  Chicago,  Ill.  He  was directing  a  plane  from  the  flight  line onto  a  taxiway  when  the  accident occurred.   Bystanders   reported   that Pine  walked  into  the  blades  of  the spinning  propeller.  The  pilot  of  the plane   was   attached   to   a   squadron operating from the aircraft carrier USS Loach. This story is compact and clearly written, but it will not satisfy the demands of the news media. Among other things, they will want to know the following: When   did   the   accident   occur?   The   Navy announced the story today, but nowhere does it say when the accident actually happened. Is there more detailed information on the victim? Readers will want to know his middle initial, age, rate, hometown address and data on his next of How did the accident happen? The facts here are too generalized and vague. kin. 6-7